Bank Holiday Monday

All week I couldn’t understand why I was feeling so low.  I seemed to be tired and finding hard to motivate myself.  I just couldn’t put my finger on it.  Then on Wednesday it dawned on me.

“Oh no!  This weekend is a Bank Holiday weekend!”

Normally Bank Holiday weekends are a good thing.  After all you don’t need to go to work.  Well yes it is a good thing and most of us like having an extra day at home, on holiday, out socializing.  Anything but working.  This is definitely the case except however, when you’re on your own.  Then the extended weekend can be desperate.

The feeling of loneliness especially at weekends is very common for single people.  1 in 10 Britons are lonely.  There is almost a need to fill every waking hour.  Monday to Friday tend to be okay.  You are juggling work with different life events.  Your mind is active and you have a purpose.  There is plenty of opportunity to meet, socialise and engage with lots of people.However, weekends can be a bit quiet, slow and lonely.  You can feel a bit isolated and actually believe the world is full of couples.  You can feel a bit of a social outcast.  Then there is a Bank Holiday.  You have to contend with the extra day.

The prospect of being alone this weekend was compounded for me by the fact the kids were both away.  Joe and nine of his mates were off to the Shambala festival best described as a “hippy fest” held somewhere in Northampton.  Whereas Georgina was a little bit more conventional and was off camping in Woolacombe, North Devon.  Therefore this weekend was definitely going to be home alone.  In addition, so many friends were going to be on holiday over this weekend.  In fact this is the first time in years that I have not been on holiday with Caroline and the kids.  Whether it was in Spain with Cher, Rich and Matt, or in Gran Canaria or in Cyprus or wherever we were away for three weeks at a time.  We had a great time.  Now it’s different.

You can either sit at home watching crap TV, counting the number of floor tiles you have in each room, sorting your sock drawer out, talking to the spiders and so on and so on.  Or you can get out there.  My policy has been over the past year is to call up family and friends and invite myself over to their houses for a cuppa (for any overseas readers a “cuppa” is an English tradition of having a cup of tea at any and every opportunity).  So Teri and Steve got the call on Saturday, which turned into an excellent evening consisting of a visit to the pub followed by a curry.  Not a cup of tea in sight.

Sunday was a little trickier.  As I said most of my friends are on holiday.   Ironically many of Caroline’s friends are single, for one reason or another whereas most of mine are in relationships.  So luckily I had a very pleasant evening with one of Caroline’s longstanding friends who explained to me how best to cope with these long weekends!  It was just great to catch up with her over a few drinks.

Finally on Monday I had lunch with my mum and dad.  Plus by this time the kids had returned home in varying degrees of soberness.  Joe’s washing pile also gave me something to do!

So why have I written this piece.  I certainly don’t want to spoil anyone’s long weekend.  When you work hard these times are precious.  When I feel lonely I have been lucky as I have a great set of family and friends that I can go to and socialize with.  There are many people in this world who aren’t so fortunate.  Life can become very desperate.  Loneliness is bad for you seriously affecting your health bbc news - loneliness . Please always pick up the phone when your single friends and family call or even better call them.  You don’t know how much it means to them.

So to all the lonely people out there.  I salute you.   We’ve got through another weekend!