Moving On Up

There is just so much going on right now!  House up for sell, the kids are home from university, job developing and meeting new people.  Then there’s my 50^th.  All good positive stuff.

House has been on the market for a couple of months now.  Although I have had quite a few viewings during this time and a huge amount of interest online none of its turned into an offer yet.  In any case many of the viewers themselves have not been in a position to buy and are just stalking properties.  Feedback about the house has generally been very good especially about the kitchen – Caroline’s dream kitchen that she designed herself.   I believe that the main issue is that the market is very buoyant at the £250k price level i.e. around the stamp duty threshold and it’s going to take a little time to climb up the price ladder before it reaches my price range.  I’m sure there is going to be a surge of interest leading up to and after Easter.  Therefore, I am taking the opportunity to spruce up the house.  I am refurbishing the main bathroom to make it look a bit more stylish and appealing.  In fact this was the next room that Caroline and I had on our list to bring up to date following the renovation of the kitchen.  The bathroom certainly needs doing as it is the original one from when the house was first built.    Elsewhere in the house the doors and the woodwork would benefit from a coat of gloss.  The garden needs clearing up after the most horrendous Winter we have just experienced.  Overall though I remain very upbeat about being able to sell the house.  However, sometimes you have to be careful what you wish for.  Once someone puts an offer in then the issues of downsizing really kick in.

Having lunch with Georgina and Joe plus their lovely partners was great.  Both the kids have grown in stature and maturity both loving their degree courses so much.  It’s so good to see them both.  Despite all of this I still don’t get the fact that Joe’s last semester seems so short.  Following the Christmas break Joe returned to college for a week after which he came back home for a month so that the lecturers could appraise the students’ work.  Joe then had a further six weeks back at Falmouth and now he is home for Easter break returning back before Easter!!!!  Is it me?  I’m not sure what the £3k per semester fees are all about.  The Film course Joe is studying is fantastic and very very interesting.  If Carlsberg ran courses it would probably be like this!

Georgina will be finishing for Easter a little later than Joe.  Georgina has just grown in confidence since September and has been a great support for me on the domestic duties front.  Never complaining and so helpful.  Georgina will be travelling with her girl friends to Thailand for a month.  What an adventure that’s going to be.  The adventure includes a trek through a jungle.  How Georgina will cope with that I just don’t know.

Following my signing up on match.com I have met all kinds of women.  I have must have been in so many Costa Coffee shops in the West of England.  I think that I’ve move beyond Costa Loyalty Card.  I should be on some sort of Share Option Scheme.  I try to use every experience in life to be a learning one.  From all these “meetings” I now know so much about Astrology you wouldn’t believe; I now know some Italian phases; and how to pack my possessions up for when I want to move.  I have visited some really nice places in Bristol, Bath, Gloucester, Cheltenham, Taunton and even a café on Clevedon front – how romantic!  Its all a bit bizarre.  I have been in coffee shops, pubs, restaurants.  Even asked one lady to help choose my tiles for my bathroom.  No flies on me!  In seriousness though its still difficult for me to chuck myself into a relationship for lots of obvious reasons.  So many people have life on their shoulders which needs to come first unlike when we were all young free and single. 

Next week I am off to Dublin with my good friends Pete, Louise and Phil with his wife Sara.  The main point of the weekend is the Leinster v Munster rugby match.  However, I will use trip as the official launch of my 50^th Birthday celebrations.  Talking of which I will be having a very busy birthday weekend.

·        11^th April – Cardiff (details TBA)

·        12^th April – Bristol which will include a visit to Rainbow Casino, Bristol.  I have just purchased 22 Groupon Vouchers for a two course meal, drink and £5 betting chips costing £10 each.  You just cannot leave that on the shelf.

·        14^th April – 50^th Birthday

So life at the moment is bumping along the road with much to look forward to.  I’m sure there will be some potholes on the journey but the direction is in the right way.  

The Butterfly Collector

“She said she was looking for her knight in shining white armour.  Blimey how disappointed is she going to be when she sees me”.

I’m sat in a coffee shop somewhere in South West England.  This has got to be one of the most surreal experiences of my life.  I’m sat in Costa Coffee waiting for a date.

How did I ever end up here?  What was I thinking of?  This is a nightmare?  What am I going to say?  What’s my first line?  Why am I even doing this?  Oh shit here she comes!  Here goes!

“Hi I’m Sue [that’s not her name just protecting the innocent]”

“Hi, I’m Paul…..”                    

Then off we chatted over coffee.  Chatting about all kinds of stuff: our kids, future plans, how we ended up on online dating, our experiences on match.com including the horror stories, gentle banter etc.  Surreal but enjoyable.  Very often she would say

“You look like your photos”

At this point I don’t know who they expected or indeed hoped for.  George Clooney perhaps!

“And you’re still here” I respond.  Always gets a little chuckle that one!

I have been having these little rendezvous all over the West of England.  Sharing a coffee.  Or wine.  Or beer.  Or lunch.  Or dinner.  Meeting some very pleasant and interesting women.  Having a laugh and enjoying myself.

The whole experience has lifted my spirits especially after how I was feeling that evening in Exeter Services.  To be honest its just good just to be out and about. Away from just staring at four walls.   Surprisingly, after the first couple of times I felt quite at ease with sitting in a coffee shop talking to complete strangers about life and the universe.  I guess I should be.  I do that for a job!  What’s the worst thing that can happen?  They walk out on you!  I have had a lot worse than that in my life so no worry there.  What generally happens is I have had an afternoon with a nice person, a bit of a laugh, in a nice place.  And they haven’t walked out. 

That's what I call an awkward first date

Like most blokes I don’t know how this dating thing works.  Women deny they are any rules but it’s all in their heads.  You have to remember that when I started “courting” Caroline we had only just passed the era where the man had to take the girl’s mother a box of chocolates, the dad wanted to know that your intentions were purely honourable and you had to be home by 10.  Nowadays apparently the first meeting is just that.  A meeting.  It’s not a date until you meet again.  That’s the biggest decision after meeting someone:  do you meet up for a second meeting i.e. first date.  What’s all that about?  It’s a minefield.  To my mind it would be much better if online dating websites were structured like “Tripadvisor”!  It would make life a lot easier.

Don’t get me wrong.  It’s not exactly impulsive or romantic in terms of “our eyes met across a crowded room”.   The whole relationship building is much slower.  That’s just as well as most people on these sites have complex background.  Plus we’re older and looking for a bit more from life.  What is clearly apparent it’s definitely the way forward and that lots and lots of people use it.  There are all kinds of flavour of sites that suit everyone taste.  For me it’s just a gentle re-introduction into the world and the start of my next chapter.