Three Months On (14th October 2012)

Wow!  My world is now so strange, weird and at times numb.  Caroline's passing still casts a shadow over our lives and I don't expect this ever to change.  How can it?  How can someone who I cherished so much and shared so much with be no longer part of my physical life.  Consequently, I have become very spiritual in order to believe that I am still connected to Caroline.  I believe that Caroline is looking down on me and kids, in fact everyone who was important to her and still guiding and directing us like she always did.

Despite my anger, frustration and lows I'm relieved that Caroline is no longer suffering.  As anyone who has been through a similar ordeal will tell you that it is unbearable to watch loved ones in such discomfort.  I'm just angry that this nasty disease, cancer, affected Caroline at all.  Caroline was too good a person to suffer.  I will love her forever.

As a family we are moving forward.  I am so relieved that Georgina has settled so well at Cardiff University.  Georgina has made so many new friends who have been so comforting when she needs a shoulder to cry on.  We are so proud!

Joe.  He has matured so much over the past months.  He and Caroline were / are so in tune with one another.  The way Joe has conducted himself has been breathtaking.   Joe has also taken his next big step.  Watch out world. Yes Joe has just taken his first driving lessons.

Our family and friends have been, and continue to be, amazing. There is no doubt that without them Georgina, Joe and me would never have got through.  For this I will never forget. I ask myself "could I have ever been as kind and considerate as them?"

We are hopeful for the future and will rebuild our lives.  No major decisions for at least a year. We will have some fun and laughs. However, we will never forget the person who made it all possible. Caroline Louise Watson aged 48