Schools Out For Summer!

“Dad I don’t like Chemistry.  I don’t want to go to Uni.  I hate Chemistry”

These are the words uttered by my darling daughter Georgina over Christmas.  Well how do you respond to that?  There are two ways you can respond to that.

The first way is that you can be very systematic. ; sit together; talk over the available options; formulate a plan with fall back options; finally implement the plan.

Or, as I did, the second way.  Rant!

“Well what are you going to do?...”,

“You can get your part time job at Primark back…”,

“How are you going to live?",

"I cant believe you want to chuck it all in...”.

“ You cant rely on the bank of Dad all your life…”

Well that helped.  Not!  Wow!  My rantings like an idiot did not help at all.  It did absolutely nothing to resolve the problem.  I was far too emotional.

Georgina and I were both looking at the same problem but from totally different ends of the telescope.  What was called for was the first approach.  Spend some time together and analyse the problem and layout the options.  We needed to understand each other viewpoints.  Get the whole picture.  LISTEN!

No matter how hard I tried I just could not do it.  I was far too emotionally charged.  I was just fearful that Georgina was going to bounce from one course to another and end up nowhere.  I had a complete blind spot to dealing with this rationally.  Some of the emotion was driven by one of Caroline’s final words to me about both the kids to complete their courses.  I was carrying this baggage.  All the stress wasn’t do either of us any good!  I knew deep down though all Caroline really wanted was them to be happy.  I just couldn't let go

The only solution was for me to ask someone to step in and have the conversation with Georgina.  Someone detached from the immediate family and someone who had an insight.  As I have said on many occasions in previous blogs I am really blessed with great friends and family to call upon.  I asked a close friend to discuss the available options with Georgina.  As a result of a dinner at Nandos the two of them have constructed a plan to:

·      Discuss the plan with Georgina’s tutor

·     Obtain a place on the Psychology degree course at Cardiff University

·      End the Chemistry course at Cardiff University

·      start looking for a job to fund her lifestyle until September

Well I was absolutely delighted that a plan had been hatched and in fact they had come up with some viable options.  Psychology was probably Georgina’s strongest subject at A Level so is a better option than Chemistry.  Georgina has been accepted onto the Psychology course.  The hardest part of the plan as any youngster will tell you will be finding a new job.  Georgina though if nothing else is persistent and she has been trying very hard.  We are very proud of her

For me the whole experience was an important learning one.  The main lesson for me is ‘Listen You Might Learn Something’!